Hello we'en

So now I've been away after what feels like forever, and it's quite hard to start up again. Hmm...

First I guess I should say that I finished a first draft of my novel tonight.  This sounds more exciting than it is.  The person who might become my agent if I can produce a novel draft that satisfies him told me that the old version (239 pages) was too short for him to sell, as it was really just novella length.  As I typed this version I added 30 pages, which is pretty good going, in my opinion, especially as the old version was in Arial and this one is in Times New Roman. Still, it's not long enough to be a novel.  I figure I need 300 pages of typescript at least to manage that. That means that over the next two weeks I somehow have to add 40 pages.  I would judge this to be medium hard, but nonetheless it means that a finished first draft (essentially an old draft plus about 40 pages, if you include ongoing revisions) is not much to get excited about.

In other news, I went to the Hallowe'en party here.  I went as a nurse. Which is to say I bought

a vinyl nurse's outfit from Ann Summers (the sex shop that appears on main streets all over the UK), stuffed some socks down the sides of my bra to make things look better, and went out to the disco and danced like a fiend (if you can imagine this dress with a woman inside who's wearing it without such obvious, um, intent, and without the stockings and little hat, that would be how I looked.  Only not brunette). What can I say?  I love dancing.  Also, I've always wanted to wear a vinyl dress.  Well, a rubber dress, really.  When I was doing my junior year abroad, there was a girl at the college I went to named Lucy Colbridge.  Lucy Colbridge was very beautiful, and not unaware of it:  she had long blonde hair, big blue eyes, and a great body (incidentally, she also had a very handsome brother name Chris, who was perhaps the nicest man alive.  He was also very handsome. Obviously, they were a blessed family.  He is now  a successful lawyer and,

amazingly, you can see a picture of him here). When that college had its Hallowe'en party, Lucy Colbridge came in a red rubber dress and just stood at the bar (hers was shinier than the one on the left, and I remember it as strapless).  In about four seconds, she had a crowd of men around her.  I don't think it was just the men that made me want a rubber dress, though:  it was also that the dress said, "I have enough confidence to be wearing this dress.  And I know I look spectacular in it!"  So I wanted, I think, not just to wear the dress, but to feel that I was spectacular enough to wear it.  And this year, because I've lost so much weight and kept it off, and because I'm far from home, I at last felt worthy of a rubber dress.  Then it turned out that rubber dresses cost about $200!!!  So I decided on a vinyl nurse's outfit.  And here's a thing:  for the very first time, I noticed men looking at my breasts.  It was quite interesting, and also enjoyable.  But I could see how if it happened your whole life it would be neither.  Still, it's interesting to know that forty pounds' worth of vinyl and a judiciously placed pair of socks can get you quite a bit of attention.  And I also noticed, as I was once told, years ago, by my then- best friend, that I actually look nice with larger breasts.  Still, the ongoing lack of sag outweighs the ephemeral advantages of large knockers.

(Incidentally, in case you were wondering, you have to dust yourself with cornstarch or talcum powder before you can even get a rubber dress on.  Otherwise it will just scrape against your skin and never slide on.  Lucy Colbridge told me that.)

Oh, and it turns out the cute guy is Catholic -- deeply Catholic.  It's a pity, 'cause he is cute, and also nice.  On the other hand, he seems a bit mathematiciany:  slightly oblivious to the world. Except the Catholic world, of course.  Ha ha.